I was in my late 30ies, when I felt ready to be a parent.

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My career was stable-ish, I had a life-partner, I thought, OK, here we go. My high school sex-ed curriculum had made unintended pregnancy sound as common as a head-cold - I thought getting pregnant would be a cinch. Wrong. After a year of trying, I mentioned to my OB-gyn that I wasn’t having any luck. The next thing I knew, I was in a doctor’s office holding a brochure full of glowing moms and smiling babies and diagrams of uteruses and ovaries. I’d never thought IVF would be a part of my own path to parenthood, but here I was, a complete newbie. 

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Because of my age, the doctor recommended that I skip less invasive procedures like IUI and cut to the chase. As it happened, my partner had just gotten a job that included IVF benefits. When I went back a few weeks later to begin my first egg retrieval cycle, the nurse showed me how to do my injections. Here’s how you mix the medications, use this needle to draw it into the syringe, use this needle for the actual injection… I couldn’t believe they let people do this at home. I remember standing on the street corner afterwards, feeling completely overwhelmed and unsure about committing to this, wondering how many other people had stood on that same corner feeling the same thing.

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My doctor informed me that the success rate for a given cycle was around 30% for someone my age.

Why that sounded optimistic to my ears, I don’t know. A few weeks later I discovered that round was not successful. Instead, it was the beginning of a four year journey to have my first child via IVF, spanning several doctors, countless procedures, unexpected complications, heartbreaking losses, and eventually, the deepest joy I have known.

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Add more here about complications, etc. 

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Over this period, I came to feel like I’d joined a club I never knew existed. So many people I met along the way confided in me about their difficult IVF experiences, and yet most of us felt like we were on our own: navigating an emotionally gruelling process and making tough decisions around healthcare and family and finances and life without adequate support. 

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Harbor IVF emerged out of wanting to create a new kind of support system for people and their partners to draw from throughout their IVF journey. One that can transform the experience into a lifelong opportunity for growth, connection and capability.

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